Remember the days back in high school or university when you would meet someone at a party or in the bar while out with your buddies, and there was instant chemistry? You’d flirt a bit, share a drink, maybe have a dance and if all went well you would steal a kiss before parting ways. At that moment the winner of your affection would ask if you’d like to go out again. You’d nod yes and off you’d go, knowing you had a guaranteed date in your near future.
Maybe it’s just me but it seems as we get older the simplicity of the first date has gone by the way of the Dodo bird. Now in order to even plan this auspicious meet up both parties have to get their daytimers out. “How about next Tuesday”…”Can’t have a meeting, but Thursday’s clear for me”…”can’t it’s parent, teacher night” and on it goes. When a date is actually secured and I use the term loosely, as it typically comes with some sort of codicil about being able to cancel if the ex can’t pick the kids up after soccer, it gets pinned in our schedules like a doctor’s appointment. The mood is then set with equal importance and intenseness. I mean we all know how hard it is to get a doctor’s appointment.
So off you go to meet this all important date. You arrive at the predetermined restaurant, the meals are ordered and then it begins. The highly sought after naivety of youthful courtship is somehow smothered by a seemingly endless artillery of questions. Let’s call it what it is, an interrogation. I mean at this age who wants to waste time with someone who doesn’t fit the bill, right? One also wouldn’t want to take the chance of being burned like in ones’ last relationship either. No no, it is vital at this tender stage of life that all concerns and potential hazards are flushed out on the first date. OMG…I’m exhausted just thinking about it
I must admit that this single girl’s tired of prearranged meetings and predetermined approval lists. I long for the happenstance meeting that turns into a wonderful romance. A relationship that is built on doing things together and learning about each other’s peccadilloes, not checking boxes to see if we’re compatible. Since when is “I don’t like scary movies” a deal breaker.
When was your last “by chance” romantic encounter? Are you allowing yourself the opportunity to have one?